|
Dearest Studly
I have returned of late from a brief jaunt to New Orleans
where I keep several gay friends. "Keep",
I believe, is the operative word... at least this is
what my boys have asked of me. Now I am asking
you. What benefits are to be gained from being "kept" at
all? I daresay (in confidentiality to you) that
I question the very position in which I find myself. Perhaps
these men--who have accepted me as their faerie queen--actually "keep" me
as well?
....A very large faerie gathering will be held in under
a fortnight atop some as yet unnamed Tennessee mountain;
I am to be present as the guiding power. Studlyhunk,
please tell me how to decipher who is actually carrying
the power. Eh-hem, it's not you, by the way. And
don't cross me. Your vanity is by far your most amusing
quality, but I am perfectly aware that I am far more vain;
I am the Faerie Queen, mad as all have thought me to be. This
said, I thank you in advance from one ego to another. Say
what you must.
The Faerie Queen
Dear Faerie Queen,
It is perfectly feasible for you to be more vain than me.
Anyone can be vain. It is an entirely different thing
for one to be vain for a REASON. Even though I may be
less vain than you, it's safe to assume that I am more
intelligent, stronger, sexier, and more good-looking.
And those are the things that are the most important.
You also point out that I am not the one who will hold
the power at your little faerie convention. This is true,
considering that your friends asked you, not me, to be
the guiding power. I am willing to bet that if I showed
up as well, they would take one look at my rock-hard pecs,
my bulging biceps and my glistening smile, and appoint
me as their new leader.
If you are so worried about what "position" you
find yourself in with these men, simply allow me to attend
the convention. Without a doubt, after beholding my greatness,
your group of faeries will realize that there has been
something better out there all along. And you will have
nothing left to worry about.
Just let me know where and when,
Mr. Studlyhunk
|
